Milly Magpie

Santa has rendered his judgment on those who were naughty or nice for 2024, and the clock has been reset on his 2025 lists. I’m typing in the glow of my Christmas tree lights, and I’m half watching my alma mater attempt to win a bowl game. The wonder and warmth of the Christmas season is still lingering, but the fa-la-la is beginning to fade. A new year is days away, and “New year, new you!” will be taking over gyms and social media outlets momentarily.

What is it about a fresh start, blank page or new chapter that feels so promising or compelling? Maybe it’s the idea of moving away from what we wish we weren’t, and moving towards what we hope to be. I think it’s hope that fuels the drive and the decisions that make the cut for New Year’s resolutions. Resolutions are far from resolute. Many crumple up their list and go back to status quo on the second Friday of January or “Quitters Day” as it is now affectionately known. I’ve never been stellar at making sweeping life style changes, and my resolutions are more helpful suggestions versus chiseled in stone. I have found the forward motion generated by small, thoughtful and seemingly insignificant acts to be the most influential agents of change. No lists required, but bonus points for kindness.

Kindness is an uncomplicated but powerful concept that taps into our instinctual and primal need to be part of a pair, family unit or larger community. Ultimately, we are pack animals. We are meant to live in close proximity to others, and the pack mentality often causes us to make decisions based on the actions of those around us. Last week I saw a monochromatic billboard on the side of the road with only three words. Just be kind. It was simple, but commanding and I was equally impressed and disappointed by its existence. Did we need signs to remind us? But I was thankful anyone driving down I-85, myself included, received the reminder.

Kindness is not new or cutting-edge. Decades ago, when I attended flight attendant training, one of our classes focused on customer service. I can no longer recite boarding announcements or safety briefs from memory, but I do remember the training takeaway from 1995. It was something within my control and had the potential to affect those far beyond my physical reach. My small act of kindness would cause a ripple effect, and continue well beyond those I encountered on my flights. A smile, warm hello or offer of assistance could inspire the next person to hold a door, offer a compliment or show patience to another human being. Humanness is our super power and we need to wield it often and well.

More recently, one of my grad school professors had us watch music videos and apply appropriate therapeutic theories. One video was, “Everybody Hurts” by R.E.M. It has been called an anthem to empathy, and was shot on a freeway during stand still rush hour traffic. Inside the confines of each vehicle, we were privy to the happiness, sadness, despair and longing simultaneously being experienced across the lane dividers. Encapsulated in their individual space, but bumper to bumper with hundreds of fellow human beings. Many of us are bumper to bumper, but isolated in plain sight.

There is an invisible heaviness some silently struggle to carry. Kindness can be the antidote. It is a free but often underutilized act that benefits both the giver and receiver. It is a remarkable feeling knowing someone’s burden is lessened, or their smile returns because you took the time to truly see them. The natural dopamine and serotonin boost created while being kind helps too.

Ernest Hemingway said, “In our darkest moments, we don’t need solutions or advice. What we yearn for is simply human connection—a quiet presence, a gentle touch. These small gestures are the anchors that hold us steady when life feels like too much.” I can’t promise your gesture will be met with gratitude, appreciation or even immediately recognized, but the ripple of kindness you place into action will continue. We are wired to be part of a community and greater good. By engaging our humanness we can can change lives and restore hope. Only three words, and limitless possibilities for a brand new 2025.

Just be kind.

KTP

“Wherever there is a human being, there is an opportunity for a kindness” ~ Seneca